Who wants to be a Millionaire!!!!!

[roosterbooster]

Here's a fun way to pass the time until somebody starts another "Why's everybody picking on Alabama thread." Email Mal Moore and let him know your qualifications and salary requirements.

mmoore@ia.ua.edu

[WallyGoat]

LOL! I'm going to email him and ask him if he got fired yet.

[AUChamps]

LOL! I'm going to email him and ask him if he got fired yet.
But Angus, Finus St. John IV, and "Peanut Butter, Jelly" won't let Mal go.

Now, you guys also hear that Ray Perkins is building a house in Tuscaloosa and there's a possibility that Newsome won't leave his GM position in the NFL for Alabama's AD position.

Do the math because Perk the Jerk might well be your new AD.

[WallyGoat]

But Angus, Finus St. John IV, and "Peanut Butter, Jelly" won't let Mal go.

Now, you guys also hear that Ray Perkins is building a house in Tuscaloosa and there's a possibility that Newsome won't leave his GM position in the NFL for Alabama's AD position.

Do the math because Perk the Jerk might well be your new AD.

Perk and Jerk? :laugh: I won't even ask where you came up with that. Actually I didn't know he was building a house in T-Town. I would love for Ozzie (Not Ozzy, but that could work too) to be our next AD. But he has a duty to the Ravens and I doubt he jumps ship just because Bama is in some turmoil right now.

[AuburnPawnTiger]

My letter that I actually sent to Mal


Dear Mal Moore

I am very interested in the head coaching job at The University of Alabama. I played 4 years of Varsity football, lettering three years and earning 5a all area team honors my senior year. I am currently pursuing my first degree in Public Communications at UNA but would totally put that on the back burner if hired. I run a Gulf Coast offense with a hint of option. A couple of my fraternity brothers said they would join my staff after finishing their beer. I have head coaching experience with numerous titles to my credit. I was head coach of the Florence 90lb team, we won the district title, ohh yeah baby. I also won back to back Powder Puff titles my Junior and Senior year. If I can coach girls, I can coach guys, right? My Name is Michael but you can cal me "Mike" that has to spark your interest. My salary requirements are $45,000 per year base salary. You know that is a bargain My coordinators said they would take anything over $10 dollars per hour(do we have to clock in?) I would need access to a university furnished vehicle. I would totally take one of those golf carts I see on game day. As far as performance incentives, well we will cross that bridge when we get there. Maybe you can sling me some iron bowl tix? If I were hired I would need a place to crash until I can find an apartment. sweet. Anyway just hit me back if you want to set up an interview, I really don't want to have to go to NY so can I just drive down?


Thank you for your time,


Michael H. Hall

PS I'll need 30 days notice If I have to take a piss test , you know what I'm saying dude

[roosterbooster]

PS I'll need 30 days notice If I have to take a piss test , you know what I'm saying dude

That's just funny.

[WallyGoat]

This was mine.......

"I am an employee at the local Burger King in Key West. I'm not gay, it's just a common misconception among fry cooks. Anywho, I am interested in taking over as AD after they fire you. I would do a superb job, far better than you ever could. I love ya, but you gotta go.

Best Wishes,
Sparky McCulken"

[AuburnPawnTiger]

That's just funny.

gotta keep it real with my future boss. I want everything to be on the table haha

[WDavE]

My resume kind of looks like Mikes.
From Mites to Midgets and then on to junios. I always seem to have a good season followed by a not so good one.

[roosterbooster]

My letter to Mal:

I here you are having trouble filling your coaching vacancy. I would like to throw my hat in the ring. I assure you I will not be as embarassing to your university as Mike or Mike, but possibly as bad as Mike. I promise to tell the players before I leave to go to any other school unless it is inconvenient for me. I would like a stipulation that I would not actually have to say roll tide. I will be willing to yell, "Run you stupid Elephant" however. For that concession I will agree to a $600,000,000 buy out. That should make you feel secure as you are the only idiot who would pay that kind of money. As for coaching experience, there is seldom a time I can remember not knowing what a coach should have done differently when the game is over. I will need an increase in my budget as other SEC schools must now be able to pay their players better than Bama. I will also need a cash advance when I travel on University business as I know you don't like your coaches putting Hookers on AMEX. For my vehicle I was thinking a Range Rover Defender. When we play Auburn I could ride to the Iron Bowl with a dead tiger on the hood. As for that Tuberville, well lets just say we won't be seeing that other thumb because if we lose I will shove it up his...

[Wizard of Orange]

TOOOO Funny, guys!!

[Lawdog]

My letter that I actually sent to Mal


Dear Mal Moore

I am very interested in the head coaching job at The University of Alabama. I played 4 years of Varsity football, lettering three years and earning 5a all area team honors my senior year. I am currently pursuing my first degree in Public Communications at UNA but would totally put that on the back burner if hired. I run a Gulf Coast offense with a hint of option. A couple of my fraternity brothers said they would join my staff after finishing their beer. I have head coaching experience with numerous titles to my credit. I was head coach of the Florence 90lb team, we won the district title, ohh yeah baby. I also won back to back Powder Puff titles my Junior and Senior year. If I can coach girls, I can coach guys, right? My Name is Michael but you can cal me "Mike" that has to spark your interest. My salary requirements are $45,000 per year base salary. You know that is a bargain My coordinators said they would take anything over $10 dollars per hour(do we have to clock in?) I would need access to a university furnished vehicle. I would totally take one of those golf carts I see on game day. As far as performance incentives, well we will cross that bridge when we get there. Maybe you can sling me some iron bowl tix? If I were hired I would need a place to crash until I can find an apartment. sweet. Anyway just hit me back if you want to set up an interview, I really don't want to have to go to NY so can I just drive down?


Thank you for your time,


Michael H. Hall

PS I'll need 30 days notice If I have to take a piss test , you know what I'm saying dude

My wife and I are crying b/c we are laughing so hard at this. Holy crap, that is hilarious. PTS!!!!