jneesy
06-04-2005, 06:06 PM
found this on another board
Capt. Jim Bonefish expert recruiting analyst....
University of Tennessee Football Recruits-Scouting Report by Captain Jim Bonefish expert recruiting Guru
>The 2005 football scouting report on UT's prized Five Star recruits
This is a condensed version of various reports modified by Capt. Jim Bonefish
Wayfron P. Jackson: 6' 6", 215 lbs. Wide Receiver. Hottest prospect fromTexas in the last ten years. Loves rap music. Will demand a mini cassette in his helmet. Currently holds world record for the most "you knows" during an interview (62 in one minute). Wayfron can print his complete name. He wants to become the first UT player to wear a BB jersey for a football uniform and yes he will wear the pads under it as long as his underwear can be cleary seen by the TV cameras.
Cletis Quinticious Jenkins: 6' 3", 220 lbs. Running Back. Set state scoring record out of Triton High School, Dunn, N.C. Also led the state in burglaries, but has only 9 convictions. He has been clocked at 4.2 seconds in the 40 yard dash with a 19" TV under each arm. He plans to major in law
or more likely lawbreaking. This is the type player that we need says Coach Fulmer. He already knows how to get out of convictions before he even got to campus so he will do just fine here. We may in fact use him as a tutor for
the other freshman.
Roosevelt "Dude" Dansell: 6' 1", 195 lbs. RunningƯ Back. From Tyler,Texas. Has processed hair and imitates Billy Dee Williams very well. Before he signed his letter of intent, he wanted the school to change colors to chartreuse and pink. Coach Fran agreed to at Texas A&M but "Dude" decided Orange
looked just fine after he got enough green from reported cash cow TenorStud and Fulmer. He listed his church preference as "red brick."
Woodrow Lee Washington: 6' 8", 310 lbs. Tackle. From a 4th generation welfare family. At 19 he's the oldest of 21 children. Mother claims Woodrow and child number 9 have same father. He has a manslaughter trial pending but feels he will be found innocent because, "The dude said something bad 'bout my Momma." He was granted approval to have a change of venue for his trail and it was moved to Knoxville. UPDATE: it appears the charges may be dropped in the next week according to Coach Fulmer who investigated his case personally.
Woodrow claims the charges were racist a interesting defense since he is white. On his entrance form,he listed his I.Q. as 20-20.
Willie "Night Train" Smith: 6'4", 225 lbs. Quarterback. Born on an Amtrak train. Birth certificate indicates he is 27 years old. Thinks the "T" on Tennessee's helmets stands for "Train," but still meets this school's stringent entrance requirements. Insists on wearing number 32 jersey since it matches his first CAT test score. You get 30 for spelling your name right I
heard and it was from a reliable source. "Train" was granted a medical-waiver and got to retake his CAT test untimed in Knoxville and scored and amazing 1000 points higher.He credits his tutor for the increase. The tutor was very proud of his student.I knew he was doing a a lot better this time because I was the instructor who gave him the test......
Tyrone "Python" Peoples: 6'10", 228 lbs. Wide Receiver. Has a pending paternity suit and two rape trials, but hopes none of his other 9 victims will file charges. Tyrone had already signed letters of intent with six other colleges but was also willing to sign with us. He credits the investigation skills of coach Fulmer in rape cases as the clencher in him signing his final letter of intent with Tennessee. Python likes wild women and
red Cadillacs. Thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican Telephone Company.
Abdul Hasheen AbbaDabaDo Ali: 6'10", 305 lbs. Guard. Played high school ball under the name Sylvester LeRoy Jones until he discovered religion in prison er rehab. Abdul thinks Sherlock Holmes is a housing project in Jacksonville. Doesn't know the meaning of the word "fear." (Doesn't know the meaning of many other words, either.)He has been in the strength program at Brushy Mountain State Prison err Rehab facility and holds all the records there. He is very fast and super
strong and fearless but may need a little coaching in football since he has been in rehab for the last 7 years and only got to play football his 3 sophmore years in HS. He should be much more mature than your average freshman however as he is at least as old as Night Train Smith
who is 27..
Note: UT's track coaches intend to use several of the above signees in
their track programs. However, instead of using a starting gun at
trackmeets, the NCAA has now agreed to use a burglar alarm.
Coach Fulmer was quoted as saying this class has an impressive record. I certainly agree with that and so do their
parole officers......
Capt. Jim Bonefish expert recruiting analyst....
University of Tennessee Football Recruits-Scouting Report by Captain Jim Bonefish expert recruiting Guru
>The 2005 football scouting report on UT's prized Five Star recruits
This is a condensed version of various reports modified by Capt. Jim Bonefish
Wayfron P. Jackson: 6' 6", 215 lbs. Wide Receiver. Hottest prospect fromTexas in the last ten years. Loves rap music. Will demand a mini cassette in his helmet. Currently holds world record for the most "you knows" during an interview (62 in one minute). Wayfron can print his complete name. He wants to become the first UT player to wear a BB jersey for a football uniform and yes he will wear the pads under it as long as his underwear can be cleary seen by the TV cameras.
Cletis Quinticious Jenkins: 6' 3", 220 lbs. Running Back. Set state scoring record out of Triton High School, Dunn, N.C. Also led the state in burglaries, but has only 9 convictions. He has been clocked at 4.2 seconds in the 40 yard dash with a 19" TV under each arm. He plans to major in law
or more likely lawbreaking. This is the type player that we need says Coach Fulmer. He already knows how to get out of convictions before he even got to campus so he will do just fine here. We may in fact use him as a tutor for
the other freshman.
Roosevelt "Dude" Dansell: 6' 1", 195 lbs. RunningƯ Back. From Tyler,Texas. Has processed hair and imitates Billy Dee Williams very well. Before he signed his letter of intent, he wanted the school to change colors to chartreuse and pink. Coach Fran agreed to at Texas A&M but "Dude" decided Orange
looked just fine after he got enough green from reported cash cow TenorStud and Fulmer. He listed his church preference as "red brick."
Woodrow Lee Washington: 6' 8", 310 lbs. Tackle. From a 4th generation welfare family. At 19 he's the oldest of 21 children. Mother claims Woodrow and child number 9 have same father. He has a manslaughter trial pending but feels he will be found innocent because, "The dude said something bad 'bout my Momma." He was granted approval to have a change of venue for his trail and it was moved to Knoxville. UPDATE: it appears the charges may be dropped in the next week according to Coach Fulmer who investigated his case personally.
Woodrow claims the charges were racist a interesting defense since he is white. On his entrance form,he listed his I.Q. as 20-20.
Willie "Night Train" Smith: 6'4", 225 lbs. Quarterback. Born on an Amtrak train. Birth certificate indicates he is 27 years old. Thinks the "T" on Tennessee's helmets stands for "Train," but still meets this school's stringent entrance requirements. Insists on wearing number 32 jersey since it matches his first CAT test score. You get 30 for spelling your name right I
heard and it was from a reliable source. "Train" was granted a medical-waiver and got to retake his CAT test untimed in Knoxville and scored and amazing 1000 points higher.He credits his tutor for the increase. The tutor was very proud of his student.I knew he was doing a a lot better this time because I was the instructor who gave him the test......
Tyrone "Python" Peoples: 6'10", 228 lbs. Wide Receiver. Has a pending paternity suit and two rape trials, but hopes none of his other 9 victims will file charges. Tyrone had already signed letters of intent with six other colleges but was also willing to sign with us. He credits the investigation skills of coach Fulmer in rape cases as the clencher in him signing his final letter of intent with Tennessee. Python likes wild women and
red Cadillacs. Thinks Taco Bell is the Mexican Telephone Company.
Abdul Hasheen AbbaDabaDo Ali: 6'10", 305 lbs. Guard. Played high school ball under the name Sylvester LeRoy Jones until he discovered religion in prison er rehab. Abdul thinks Sherlock Holmes is a housing project in Jacksonville. Doesn't know the meaning of the word "fear." (Doesn't know the meaning of many other words, either.)He has been in the strength program at Brushy Mountain State Prison err Rehab facility and holds all the records there. He is very fast and super
strong and fearless but may need a little coaching in football since he has been in rehab for the last 7 years and only got to play football his 3 sophmore years in HS. He should be much more mature than your average freshman however as he is at least as old as Night Train Smith
who is 27..
Note: UT's track coaches intend to use several of the above signees in
their track programs. However, instead of using a starting gun at
trackmeets, the NCAA has now agreed to use a burglar alarm.
Coach Fulmer was quoted as saying this class has an impressive record. I certainly agree with that and so do their
parole officers......