Jump to content

Welcome to SECTalk.com

Welcome to SECTalk.com -- The Home of 6 Straight National Titles!

You are currently accessing our site as a guest which means you can't access all of our features such as social groups, sports betting, and many more. By joining our free community you will have access to all of these great features as well as to participating in our forums, contacting other members, and much more. Registration only takes a minute and SECTalk.com is absolutely free, so please join today!

If you have any problems registering or signing in, please contact us.


U.S. to cut ties with Alabama

- - - - -

  • Please log in to reply
35 replies to this topic

#1
Gidnik

Gidnik
  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • Posts:
    5,500
  • Age:
    35
  • Joined:
    Aug 2009
  • Cash:
    1,000
  • High Fives:
    3,639

WASHINGTON—Stressing the importance of protecting the nation’s global image, consultants from the public relations firm of Hill & Knowlton have advised the United States to begin distancing itself from the state of Alabama as soon as possible, sources confirmed Wednesday.

The marketing team, which reportedly cited results from focus groups and surveys that revealed a widespread perception of the state as misguided, intolerant, and poorly educated, has strongly encouraged U.S. officials to downplay its connections with Alabama and to avoid being seen in any of its cities.

“At this time, we believe it’s in America’s best interests to discontinue its relationship with Alabama,” said Hill & Knowlton senior partner Dylan Feldstone, adding that the United States and Alabama were “heading in two different directions right now.” “Please note that we are not saying there is anything wrong with Alabama. It’s just that as the United States works to maintain and strengthen its worldwide reputation, we believe it is everyone’s best interests if it parts ways with the state.”

“We’re certain the state of Alabama will understand this,” Feldstone continued. “They know how these things work.”

According to high-level sources, the consultants singled out Alabama as a major obstacle to the U.S. efforts to establish an appealing brand, noting that it ranks in the top five among states in obesity, divorce, and poverty rates.

“When people think about the United States, the last image you want in their head is Alabama,” said Feldstone, renowned for helping turn around the reputations of clients such as Nike, Robert Downey Jr., and Myanmar. “There are other states with a lot going for them. Look at Colorado or California. And Utah is beautiful—the world wants to see that. But there’s nothing about Alabama shouting ‘cutting-edge country I want to invest in.’”

Though they clarified that their recommendation was solely a business decision and was not meant to belittle Alabama, the consultants reportedly emphasized that the nation must take steps to suppress every facet of the 22nd state’s ignominious reputation.

“There’s just a lot of baggage with Alabama,” said Feldstone, noting the state’s history of controversy was “not something anyone wants to be associated with.” “Everyone knows about the racial issues. The violence, the intolerance, the whole Birmingham fiasco in 1963. That’s not the image you want to project while you seek new investors.”

At press time, sources indicated that government officials were also considering the PR firm’s recommendation that they slowly phase out Mississippi over the next five years.

Posted Image

#2
DjCrenshaw

DjCrenshaw
  • Members
  • PipPip
  • Posts:
    1,755
  • Joined:
    Jun 2014
  • Cash:
    1,000
  • High Fives:
    696
Finally... Less talk and more action.

#3
possumslayer

possumslayer

    Orange & White Supremacist

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • Posts:
    7,572
  • Age:
    48
  • Joined:
    Oct 2013
  • Location:
    Lincoln county Tennessee
  • Cash:
    1,700
  • High Fives:
    3,542
Rip alabubba

#4
Haymaker

Haymaker
  • Members
  • PipPip
  • Posts:
    2,985
  • Joined:
    Oct 2011
  • Cash:
    1,000
  • High Fives:
    1,827
Alabamas credit score just improved

#5
GoldenRebel

GoldenRebel

    A Proud Swayze Crazy

  • Moderators
  • PipPipPipPip
  • Posts:
    21,224
  • Age:
    27
  • Joined:
    May 2007
  • Cash:
    0
  • High Fives:
    10,273
Bama wins again

#6
bbqit

bbqit
  • Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • Posts:
    19,696
  • Age:
    55
  • Joined:
    Dec 2004
  • Cash:
    1,000
  • High Fives:
    7,788

View PostGoldenRebel, on 24 July 2014 - 07:29 AM, said:

Bama wins again

Since it appears we are next on the hit list this may be a good time to do the if you can't beat them join them thing.
Du-te la dracu 'LSU

#7
CrimsoNation713

CrimsoNation713

    I'm an angel in an earth suit

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • Posts:
    20,492
  • Joined:
    Nov 2005
  • Location:
    Olympus
  • Cash:
    1,000
  • High Fives:
    7,174
now this...idiot

http://www.tuscaloos...29896?p=2&tc=pg
"Whenever I see those crimson jerseys and crimson helmets, I feel humbled to have played football for Alabama. Other players in the NFL talk to me about their schools and their traditions. I just smile knowing the immense love Alabama fans have for our school and its football program. I'm proud to be a part of that Crimson Tide heritage."

-- Derrick Thomas

#8
jthomas666

jthomas666

    This Space for Rent

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • Posts:
    6,618
  • Age:
    51
  • Joined:
    Dec 2006
  • Cash:
    1,000
  • High Fives:
    3,335

View PostCrimsoNation713, on 24 July 2014 - 09:02 AM, said:

When Bentley said Alabama needs a doctor, no one realized he meant Dr. Kevorkian.
Posted Image

Testimonials:

"very fair, very funny, very condemnatory"  -- Harlan Ellison
"That dumbass with the Kermit avatar" -- razorhead


#9
1dawgfan09

1dawgfan09

    Go strong or don't go.....

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • Posts:
    14,810
  • Age:
    28
  • Joined:
    Dec 2009
  • Cash:
    1,000
  • High Fives:
    6,548

View PostCrimsoNation713, on 24 July 2014 - 09:02 AM, said:


So, your governor wants to take funding away from something that already is woefully underfunded? Sounds Mississippian enough to me for the twin states to merge and get along just fine.
I'm certain the national media is relieved. They can kiss State's ass and go back to the old "Ole Miss is Waycist" narrative. Meanwhile I hope Gameday has fun in Morgantown. Look out for burning couches!

#10
1dawgfan09

1dawgfan09

    Go strong or don't go.....

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • Posts:
    14,810
  • Age:
    28
  • Joined:
    Dec 2009
  • Cash:
    1,000
  • High Fives:
    6,548
If anything, the Southern states need to pour money into education. The biggest reason big business won't relocate here is because they see our people as being too stupid to work technical jobs, and a lot of that comes from our backward educational system.
I'm certain the national media is relieved. They can kiss State's ass and go back to the old "Ole Miss is Waycist" narrative. Meanwhile I hope Gameday has fun in Morgantown. Look out for burning couches!

#11
GoldenRebel

GoldenRebel

    A Proud Swayze Crazy

  • Moderators
  • PipPipPipPip
  • Posts:
    21,224
  • Age:
    27
  • Joined:
    May 2007
  • Cash:
    0
  • High Fives:
    10,273

View Post1dawgfan09, on 24 July 2014 - 09:26 AM, said:

If anything, the Southern states need to pour money into education. The biggest reason big business won't relocate here is because they see our people as being too stupid to work technical jobs, and a lot of that comes from our backward educational system.

Which starts with a lottery

#12
possumslayer

possumslayer

    Orange & White Supremacist

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • Posts:
    7,572
  • Age:
    48
  • Joined:
    Oct 2013
  • Location:
    Lincoln county Tennessee
  • Cash:
    1,700
  • High Fives:
    3,542
Will there be a wall?

#13
1dawgfan09

1dawgfan09

    Go strong or don't go.....

  • Members
  • PipPipPipPip
  • Posts:
    14,810
  • Age:
    28
  • Joined:
    Dec 2009
  • Cash:
    1,000
  • High Fives:
    6,548

View PostGoldenRebel, on 24 July 2014 - 09:30 AM, said:

Which starts with a lottery

Been saying this for years.
I'm certain the national media is relieved. They can kiss State's ass and go back to the old "Ole Miss is Waycist" narrative. Meanwhile I hope Gameday has fun in Morgantown. Look out for burning couches!

#14
GoldenRebel

GoldenRebel

    A Proud Swayze Crazy

  • Moderators
  • PipPipPipPip
  • Posts:
    21,224
  • Age:
    27
  • Joined:
    May 2007
  • Cash:
    0
  • High Fives:
    10,273

View Post1dawgfan09, on 24 July 2014 - 09:45 AM, said:



Been saying this for years.

In what world is it ok to have 20 casinos but not a lottery

#15
possumslayer

possumslayer

    Orange & White Supremacist

  • Members
  • PipPipPip
  • Posts:
    7,572
  • Age:
    48
  • Joined:
    Oct 2013
  • Location:
    Lincoln county Tennessee
  • Cash:
    1,700
  • High Fives:
    3,542
Do y'all really want an educated bama fan?






0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users